keeping up appearances

it’s always slightly startling to see one’s own breath, expelled in arctic gust, exhaled at sub-zero. it carries on longer than you’d first expect, like cartoon wind. a surprise, we suppose, the bigness of it. the simplest instinct, the essence, so rarely regarded. so rarely an intent.

when the words (you know the ones, the only ones that matter) catch one of those big-ass breaths (the ride of their life) they never sound as you dreamed them. never the narrative you’d played out, nor in. liberating, to forget what you meant and just say what you mean. let words tumble out stark and nude, off the script. they take on this weight like gravity (that night a dash of fury, brute force determined, raw from heady tokes). pulled down into destiny like a chip through the pegs of a plinko board. the only way the way it goes. those mere minutes leave mark forever. those dances make up the truth of time.

we’ve always preferred to roll that way, filter free, from the call of the gut. to us it seems life might go smoother if everyone just said it straight, less the complications that bullshit will bring. must be tiring, keeping all that fake straight. we’ve since learnt our lesson though, since come to see we are most certainly the minority. ignorance (while not bliss) is at least a moving target, a lure to chase. the truth usually just fucking hurts.

21 thoughts on “keeping up appearances”

  1. Anonymous says:


  2. Anonymous says:

    B&R this is my favourite posts yet. Perfect balance of art and attitude. More more more.

  3. Anonymous says:

    This isn't meant mean spiritedly, but aren't you ever worried that fellow exployees (or employers) will read le blog and see all your pot talk? Not terribly professional imo… Always enjoy reading your posts 🙂 More Worn please!

  4. AOK says:

    My 2011 resolution is to tell people exactly what I think, when I think it. So needless to say it's going to be a good year 😉 hehehe

  5. Anonymous says:

    I think you should blog on all the dumbs who think weed is worse than boozin. What's a few tokes when everyone else is stumbling, slurring drunk?

  6. Anonymous says:

    For christ sakes Anon 5, all they were asking/stating was whether she thought it unprofessional publicly blogging about her weed habits knowing her colleagues read this. Not stating that one was better than the other. Get your facts straight.

  7. Anonymous says:

    Dear Anon 5,

    I have absolutely no qualms with someone who enjoys smoking weed. As the holder of a Fine Arts Degrees I have witnessed first hand how toking up can literally free your mind and allow you to express creativity in amazing ways. As Anon 6 pointed out I'm merely questioning the professionalism and risks taken in displaying this habit to fellow workers.


    Anon 3

  8. Anonymous says:

    B and R obviously doesn't care, and nor should she off the clock. My opinion, Anon-Whatever.

  9. Anonymous says:

    "to us it seems life might go smoother if everyone just said it straight, less the complications that bullshit will bring".

    If everyone was honest there would be wayyy more bullshit and drama. too bad though.

  10. Anonymous says:

    "we've always preferred to roll that way, filter free, from the call of the gut" – ahh the oh-so-popular "brutal honesty (regardless of the cost)" philosophy. While it's trendy, especially among teenage and early twenty-something girls, it also tends to be foolish and unnecessarily hurtful to others. The possession of a filter lodged between the mouth and the brain is a good thing. It's called tact.

  11. Anonymous says:

    Interesting that you deleted that fellows comment B&R. Shitty.

  12. Anonymous says:

    if you can't stand the heat….

  13. Anonymous says:

    Will we be blessed with a 'filter free' rantie in response to the filter free comment that was deleted, B&R?

  14. Anonymous says:

    I didn't see the comment deleted but what's the big deal? Its your blog. I personally don't expect you to host anonymous idiots and their bullshit abuse. If it were me, I'd be deleting a lot more often. Blog on (and more) ~ CJ

  15. Anonymous says:

    enough about the blogger lets get back to the blog.

  16. Anonymous says:

    If you want to rise, surround yourself with people who make you better, not people to keep you down. TDL

  17. Anonymous says:

    You're an incredible person B & R! I know firsthand. Keep blogging and forget about the hatters. They must have some real issues to feel the need to attack you. Xoxo

  18. Anonymous says:


  19. Anonymous says:

    free marc emery

  20. Anonymous says:

    Where is B&R?

Comments are closed.