bras and ranties just had a drink with a notably distraught friend, and now feel it necessary to reiterate to all women one decidedly important dating rule of thumb: never, ever date a man who drives a porsche.

ultimate driving machine, you say? pfft. a man who drives a porsche was either a humungo loser in highschool or his peepee is weewee. probably both. either way – major insecurity issues. and if it’s a cayenne! i can’t even begin.

upon discussion, it was resolved that a porsche is only hot if 1) it is your secondary vehicle; or 2) you’re female. so…c’i borrow?